Our temperatures have been in the single Fahrenheit digits for a couple of days now, so to get Josie O (my Chihuahua) her quota of mental stimulation, I’ve been taking her to stores. Yesterday we went to Marshalls. I put her carry box in the front of the cart, and she stood with her front paws on the edge, like the figurehead of a ship if the figurehead of a ship were covered in fur and made licky faces at people. (Note to self: horror movie idea: seafaring werewolves.)
Afterwards, I stopped by Ideal market and bought Popsicles, because no weather is too cold for Popsicles unless you’re in a tent.
In other news, I’m reading Maddy Hunter‘s Passport to Peril mysteries, which are hilarious. In Pasta Imperfect, two bestselling romance writers bicker about how “ten inches of flaming virility” really behaves.
“People have actually done surveys and the consensus is, it doesn’t throb!”
I cleared my throat and raised a tentative finger in the air. “If you ladies don’t mind my asking, if it doesn’t throb, what does it do?”
“Maybe it quivers,” Nana said thoughtfully. “You know, kind of like a handheld blender.”
So I’m going to put Maddy Hunter on my list of fantastically funny mystery writers, up there with Laura Levine, that goddess of laughter.
Lastly, I seem to be over my embarrassing writers block and working well on Critter from the Black Lagoon again, although there was a moment when it was possibly going to be Beaver from the Black Lagoon, because in addition to killer hogs, prehistoric central Florida was also home to beavers the size of black bears.
Luckily, a cooler head prevailed (my head, just cooler), and I’m sticking with pigs.
I’m still shooting for a July release date, which is the soonest I can bring it out according to my contract with St. Martin’s.
P.S. If you don’t understand the title of this post, it’s a reference to the movie Groundhog Day.
Esri Allbritten 
Thanks so much for the shout-out, Esri. I’m tickled that you’re enjoying the series… and laughing. That’s what I love to hear! I’m also delighted that you singled out the feuding romance writers. I had such a great time fleshing them out. Having once written romances myself, I felt supremely qualified to comment on romance heroes and their… um… equipment. I actually conducted the survey you mention in your blog. Seriously. And the result was — it really doesn’t throb. I was SO happy to put that in print! Thanks again for the nod. ~ maddy
I’ve also written/published some romance, so it was extra fun for me. LOVE that you actually carried out that poll. HA!
As for my vote, I swear I feel some throbbing, but I guess it depends on what point in the process you’re talking about. Still, the handheld blender line was freakin’ GENIUS. I called my parents up just to read it to them. We’re all reading your series, but I’m ahead.
Hi Esri,
Thanks for the laugh. Going to look up those books.
Cheers!
Chelle
Cool! They’re well worth your time.
Hmmm…We’ve been in single digits here in Wyoming, too…only they had minus signs in front of them. I spend a little of my time wondering what book/movie/or other you can take the title from. Never thought of Creature From The Black Lagoon. Congrats on that one! Dori
Yeah, we haven’t had much in the way of minus signs yet. Still, I wore long johns under my jeans to drive Angel Joe to work this morning, and I haven’t taken them off yet now that I’m home. You getting much snow?
Actually, not much snow. That supposedly fell to the north of us, or so they say. Warmer tomorrow.